Thirty years ago today, the final journey toward the reality of motherhood began. My son was still a few days from being born. I had been diagnosed with preeclampsia in early April and put to bed shortly after hoping that the baby would come on his due date, May 11th. On May 28th I was admitted to the hospital to induce labor. Patrick has always arrived on his schedule; he was born Friday, May 30th at 3:50 p.m.
A few thoughts for Patrick. Yeah, I know I’ll see you in a few hours to begin the birthday celebration but in looking through pictures (and not finding some baby pictures) I thought I’d write this. If you’re going to stop reading now, remember that birthdays are only a number. Celebrate them and be grateful. 
- Other memories will surely fade but I will never forget the moment they placed you in my arms for the first time. That moment and you were both miracles. There was a purpose in my life beyond anything I had ever known. For that I will always be grateful.
As ‘the guinea pig child’, by now you’re well aware I haven’t had all of the answers and still don’t. You’ve learned that if you don’t know something, ask for help. I haven’t always been a good example of that….single mom syndrome.- Life is about discovering who we are by learning…we make mistakes. Try not to blame others for them. Most of the time those others aren’t giving us a second thought and the blame or regret only hurts us. Evaluate then move on.
- Travel….see the world, read books, do it with friends, family, go alone. It’s the greatest education there is.
- Thirty is a new beginning. . .and there will be lots of new beginnings. Life is chock-full of ups and downs. Don’t linger too long on the mountain tops or wallow too long in the valleys.
Candle for Patrick’s cake since 1987 - Surround yourself with good people. Friends and family who are solid, that you can count on. You come from ‘good stock’. Choose wisely.
- Take time for you. . .laugh every day.
And always remember..
…I love you forever…
It seems easy today for some people to say petty, unnecessary things, abuse social media. Why is it much easier for humans to wrap themselves around problems, negativity and blaming rather than around joy? Why is it easier to point out differences than embrace what makes us unique or see the common ground. The week had been complicated.
It’s a balancing act in the best sense. My children are living proof. 
On New Year’s Day 2011 I walked a labyrinth under a beautiful sky filled with stars. Under the stars that same winter my daughter was in her third year of undergraduate school studying in Prague, my son was in his mid-20’s working his way up the corporate ladder. The steps we all took that year were adventure-filled marked with enthusiasm. We were miles apart yet connected. It had seemed like such a short journey from infancy to adulthood for them. That night at the beginning of a new year, I resolved to start on a path of self-discovery. I’ll always be their mother but the time had come to find an adult self apart from being a parent. Along this new journey I’ve had the time to nurture my own interests and career, travel, to reacquaint with friends from childhood, college and beyond who had been on adventures of their own—building careers and families.
I’ve explored and discerned. Some choices were great, some not so great but they were mine. 
BethSings 